Discussion Question #10- Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close

“Sometimes I can hear my bones straining under the weight of all of the lives I’m not living” (113). This quote by Oskar’s grandfather is an excellent example of the theme of interconnectedness among the characters in Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close. Oskar has important connections with people he has never met, including his own grandfather. In a way, the lives of Oskar and his grandfather are similar. Both of them experience a loss of something very important to them (Oskar loses his father, and Oskar’s grandfather loses Anna, his son, and his speech). Oskar’s journey throughout the novel when he is searching for the key has several parallels to his grandfather’s own search for something meaningful in life. Both characters are seeking to gain something positive out of a negative experience. The author also draws parallels between Oskar’s tragic experiences and those of his grandfather by mentioning not only the events of 9/11, but also the Dresden bombings that his grandfather witnessed, which are very similar in tragic nature. Neither Oskar nor his grandfather are alone in experiencing these sorts of terrible events.
The quote also demonstrates, on a larger scale than just Oskar and his grandfather, how all of the people mentioned in the book have at least one thing in common with one another, and this is that every one of them has experienced some sort of loss or tragedy. Oskar’s grandfather mentions in the quote how he feels as if he is carrying the weight of several other people’s lives, not just his own. Oskar feels the same way about even people he has never met. He calls his collection of photos of tragedies and accidents that happened to other people “Stuff that Happened to Me” (42). Although he obviously did not experience these things such as decapitations and shark attacks, this is Oskar’s way of coping with the loss of his father by showing himself that bad things also happen to other people, and he is not alone. He presents a report in school on the bombing of Hiroshima and the great amount of human suffering that came as a result. This too is one of Oskar’s ways of dealing with loss, knowing that other people have experienced things that are just as horrific as the victims of 9/11 and their families have experienced.
Overall, Oskar’s search for the key and his grandfather’s letters are both ways that the two characters connect with each other as well as with those around them. Oskar interacts with many people he has never met and still feels as if something important exists between them in some way or another. For example, Mr. Black and Oskar develop a fairly strong relationship in just a short amount of time that all started simply because of his last name. Even though Oskar and his grandfather have never [knowingly] met, they are still living their lives in a very similar way through one another’s experiences. In a way, Oskar is picking up his grandfather’s lifelong search where he left off, and because of this, both of them are feeling the strain of lives other than their own.